Hey there Fuzz-to the B. It's me, Chetty-pie. Sorry I totally spaced on your birthday the other day. I totally meant to shoot you a cute hoops and yo-yo hallmark card, but I got a little distracted by the craziness of my current household situation. I mean, I have two little human terrors running around my place grabbing at my floofy tail.
Let me tell you, I used to enjoy my silky long fur. Now, it is totally a disadvantage. With all the extra fluff to catch, I totally get my rump kicked. You haven't felt pain until you have a grubby little human hand tearing out a chunk of tail fur. Man, it's the worst. Besides all that craziness my mom's birthday was yesterday so I had to try my hardest to make her happy.
I spent all day looking in the woods for the perfect little gift for her. I had a baby squirrel cornered for a stint, but he got away when I was distracted by the Tobster. Stupid Toby, he thinks he is so suave. I think he even said he tried to seduce you a while back. He thinks he is the best just because he can use big words. Toblerone is not my type of cat, more trouble than he's worth if you ask me.
Look at Mr. Toblerone there, so relaxed. That's because he lives through the magic door that separates him from the little human monsters with the sticky fingers. I'd like to see what he'd look like if he had to live in my section of the compound. Keep up your relaxing Mr. Tobster. Keep it up. Anyway, happy birthday Fuzzbucket! Hope to see you soon!
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